Monday 18 December 2017

St Pancras 150

St Pancras Station turns 150 next year.  And already there's a souvenir shop selling overpriced tat high quality gifting ware in the station.

But it's pretty standard stuff. Beefeaters, red phoneboxes kind of thing.

So the Beaker Folk figured we'd get in on the act. After all, it's just down the road. And Flitwick and Bedford are on that line.  So why not try:

Wind-up John Betjeman: Just tell this lovingly die-cast figurine that you like modernist architecture, and he'll satirise you in scathing verse.

Intercity 125 Action Model: Albeit the "action" is standing just outside Harpenden due to a points failure at East Hyde.

Plaque to the Unknown Commuter: Commemorating the stoicism of the person on that HST at Harpenden who managed not to use their entire battery complaining about the delay on Twitter.

Scale models of Bishop Stopford Schoolchildren: Desperately doing their homework on the run from Market Harborough to Kettering.

Commemorative Pint Glass: To remember the hike in beer prices when the "Shires" bar was replaced by the Betjeman Arms

Model Fussy Train Manager: Insisting the cyclists with folding bikes put them in the right luggage area. Not that one.  That one. Not on the top. It might fall off.

Manspreading Voodoo Doll With authentic pins (please do not use the pins in real life)

27,000 spare editions of "Metro"

Life-Sized "Luggage" from The Colour of Magic: Trained to swallow whole anyone that is walking at high speed though St Pancras while looking at their phones.

Special Edition St Pancras 15 Monopoly Board ; Actually, we've just got an ordinary one and crossed out the word "Kings Cross" and written in "St Pancras". And knocked 50 quid off the cost of the station.

A Bottle of  Cannabis and Burger Scent: Recreate in your own home the experience of walking through Camden Town on the way to the station.




Want a good laugh? Want to laugh at the church? Want to be secretly suspicious that the author has been sitting in your church committee meetings taking notes? Then Writes of the Church: Gripes and grumbles of people in the pews is probably the book for you.

From Amazon, Sarum Bookshop, The Bible Readers Fellowship and other good Christian bookshops. An excellent book for your churchgoing friends, relatives or vicar. And don't forget it's nearly Christmas!

3 comments :

  1. Please tell me where I can get a Manspreading Voodoo Doll?

    ReplyDelete
  2. Flashlight Annie - try your nearest 'Voodoo Dolls R Us'

    ReplyDelete

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