Monday, 27 August 2012

The Lamb Lies Down In the Moot House

Filling-up of Beakers - set to "Lamb Lies Down on Broadway" (Gabriel)

The procession moves towards the Worship Focus (an aerosol paint can).

Behind the procession, Hnaef drags a railway luggage trolley. On the trolley is clearly a large quadruped - padded with powdered wool, and swathed in Lifeless Packaging.

Horrified, the Beaker People turn to view Hnaef's exhibit. Can it be what they fear?

Marston Moretaine: Is it the.... Essex Lion?

All: Ooooh. Lion.

Rael: A Lamb?

All: Aaaah. Lamb.

A salamander scurries into flame to be destroyed, as imaginary creatures are trapped in birth on celluloid. 

Stacey Bushes: Is it the... Northampton Newt?

All: No. Too small.

The neon dims to the cold and white. Lilith, first wife of Adam, lurks in the undergrowth, snickering in a French Canadian accent for no apparent reason.

Bargest - Is it the.... Milton Keynes Meerkat?

All: Noooh. Not friendly enough.

The Klu Klux Clan sell hot soul food, while the Beaker Quire plays "In the Mood".

Garbut: The Towcester Tiger?

A frisson of fear passes through the Beaker People.

Hnaef: No! It's the.... Bedford Badger!

All: A BADGER? Aaaaagh! 


Panic-struck Beaker People flee the Moot House. Those with a high degree of rationalism remain, as Hnaef's "pet" chases out after the Beaker People.

Archdruid: I am glad you are here with me. Here at the end of all things, Burton.”

Burton: Well, I know I've got sunshine in my stomach!

Archdruid: I'm counting out time....

Burton: Erogenous zones, I love you. Without you what would a poor boy do? It's the last great adventure left to mankind.

The Archdruid sloshes Burton with her cricket bat

Archdruid: Death would be a greater adventure, you loathsome train-spotter.

Burton: I think I need a visit to the Doktor...

Slippermen: We like you have tasted love. Don't be alarmed at what you see.

Burton: You yourself are just the same as what you see in me.

Burton and the Slipperman leave the Moot House, discussing SQL injection techniques and their prevention.


Archdruid: When you eat right fru it you see everything alive.

Remaining Beaker People: It is inside spirit, with enough grit to survive.

The Cage descends, trapping John and Rael.

Dismissal

Archdruid: OK guys, let's go. And watch out for the Lamia. They'll alarm yer.

3 comments :

  1. !!!!!

    (A Discworld quotation)

    love Mags B xx

    ReplyDelete
  2. Whatever you're on it's just improved a wet bank holiday

    ReplyDelete

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