Shamelessly ripping off an idea from the Maverick Philosopher, can we suggest:
Ford Anglican: Fitted with a steering wheel in the centre of the car, so everyone can try to drive it. In practice, it weaves about a bit but stays more-or-less in the middle of the road.
Mazda Methodist: Propelled by a "warmed" heart". Can still be restarted but sometimes appears to have conked out.
Triumph Televangelist: Fitted with a credit card reader. Every time you give, you get just a bit closer to your destination.
Fiat Ordinariate: Designed for driving across the Tiber. We wait to see whether it just gets halfway, or whether it gets there, turns round and comes back.
Rover's Witness: This small urban car is specially designed for very short journeys - from one house to the next. Also suitable for making quick getaways.
Daihatsu Unitarian: Remarkably tolerant, you can put petrol, diesel, banana oil or chip fat in the tank. Runs equally well on each, but the SatNav is never really sure about the vehicle's destination.
and just remembered that old favourite...
Austin Ekklesia - The steering is fixed so it constantly goes left.
My parents' last car was a Ford of some description, which had a couple of little faults, including a display that, every time you turned the key in the ignition, would flash up a warning "arrange service" and could not be reset.
ReplyDeleteMy father refused to get this fixed as he said he found it helpful - he's a Methodist minister...
Hilarious. Thank you!
ReplyDeleteWhat about the Ford Karismatic or the Austin Healer?
ReplyDeleteI like these but have to say that the Daihatsu Unitarian knows where it's going but likes to take the scenic route to get there :)
ReplyDelete(Old UU joke: the Universalists thought that God was too good to damn anyone; the Unitarians thought they were too good for God to damn them.)