Of course, it's all very well Drayton moaning and repenting about his heresies. It's not like I didn't have problems of my own yesterday.
The La Tene Folk of Tebworth had invited me to lead their All Age Worship. And, as is customary with our traditions, I'd picked the hymns and readings.
But when I got there I discovered that "All Age" was a synonym for "All Ages from 60 to 90". But, nothing daunted, I stuck with my script. If All Age is what they want, All Age is what they get.
Be fair to them. Some of them were sufficiently free from arthritis to do the actions to "If I were a butterfuly". Although there was a strong scent of liniment later on during coffee time. And they all enjoyed joining in with a congregational reading of "We're going on a bear hunt". But we had some problems when I let off those party poppers. They though the Blitz had re-started.
I thought 'all ages' actually means '0-9 years, everyone else leave your intellect at home, just have fun', sort of thing. Ah well. My mistake.
ReplyDeleteFrankly, I had to ban the 80-95 age group from my coven. Every time you over-buttered the gammon baps, some crinkly would pipe up "That's a week's ration, you know", and launch into a whine about how they were brought up to eat their snoek, and lived in fear of being hauled up before a judge, like Helen Duncan.
ReplyDeleteThe final straw came when Endora's doctor told her to avoid inhaling incense. when she hooked up to her nebuliser, it over-excited the gas-mask fetishists, and they ran amok all the way down the High Street, and were finally picked up by the police at a swingers party in Mobberley. (Unfortunately due to the fact they had lost their hearing aids, they didn't realise it was the AGM of the Nether Alderley Bell Ringing Society).