Thursday, 2 December 2010

Literary Stereotypes

And a big welcome to our new family.
You'll probably see more of Horsley Woodhouse, and his brother Mansfield Woodhouse. Due to their parents moving after Horsley was born, the brothers were born either side of the Nottinghamshire-Derbyshire border. They've been fighting ever since. Apparently when they were asked to carry out chores when children, Horsley would stand up for his rights while Mansfield could be lured by the promise of sweets to do what he was told.

Meanwhile, Mr Woodhouse is mostly to be found in the library. He has already decided that the kitchen area is too dangerous, due to the hot fats and sharp utensils. Likewise the grounds are out of bounds to Mr W, as he is afeared he may be pursued by a rogue badger. He tends to stay out of the room he shares with Mrs Woodhouse, as she has a habit of sitting around all day complaining about her fake illnesses and having fits of the vapours. However even in the library Mr Woodhouse doesn't feel that secure. He sits around (on a chair with legs, not an office chair that could easily roll away), looking nervously up at the shelves in case a book falls on him. We may have trouble getting the pair of them to join in acts of worship - he's scared a tea light may set him on fire, while she claims that scented candles bring on her bronchitis.


  1. Presumably they all live under the Woodhouse Eaves?

  2. It's really nice to hear of a normal family group joining your community.

    Dis-funtionality seems to me to now be the norm, and in good british tradition, they are sticking to hwat they know.

    Are you sure they come from the midlands, as a family very similar to them recently disappeared from our area - we forgot to report them missing, as they might be brought back.


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